Are your judgments blocking your success?
My question today is . . . What’s your theme?
But, you gotta imagine the ‘what’s your dream?’ guy from the movie Pretty Woman saying it. ‘What’s your theme? Everybody got a theme. What’s your theme?’(Don’t know the Pretty Woman guy? Watch here.)
January 2014 is coming to a close and I’m wondering how you are doing on your theme, intentions and/or resolutions? Taking stock throughout the year is one way to get better results. So, how are you doing?
Are you moving along at a nice steady pace?
Have you gotten derailed?
Are you in denial about your derailment or judging it?
No matter where you are, there you are. In all of it’s imperfect perfection.
If you are right on track, pat yourself on the back. Seriously. Share a brag in the comments and acknowledge yourself – even for the tiniest thing. That will not only keep you going, but inspire others to keep going too. Plus, it’s scientifically proven that acknowledging yourself will help you feel whole, happy and accomplished on the journey. (Research here.)
If you have gotten derailed, take pause. Remind yourself that it’s okay. That you are okay. You are human and we fall a lot before we walk.
Before you assess the situation, first see if you have any judgments running about your success or failure. About whether you are behind or can’t find the time or can’t keep your word to yourself.
When judgments are active, they inhibit your ability to see clearly, so you must address them first. By acknowledging them – that they are there. They will continue to control things from the shadows unless you bring them to the light.
Next, ask yourself if they are true? Are they really, without a doubt 100% true? Probably not.
If they are not, look at what they are providing you? What is the benefit of them? For example, if your intention was to exercise for pleasure at least three days a week and you didn’t even make it through week one, a judgment could be: “I’m a complete failure.” “I can’t even keep my word to myself.” “I’ll never be able to love exercise like I used to.”
Once determining these assumptions aren’t actually accurate, you can look at what you are getting out of them. In this example, you could be getting the pleasure of staying where you are? You could be getting to continue blaming your schedule, your time, your family, and not taking responsibility for your life and happiness? You could be getting to avoid fully showing up in your life?
These are all possibilities.
Ask yourself if the benefits are worth it? Do they justify your judgments? Probably not. Because you wouldn’t have set out to make a change if you wanted to stay stuck, yes?
So, regroup, forgive yourself, get creative and get in action. How can you support yourself in recommitting to your theme/intention?
Maybe exercising three days a week is too much, so you downshift to one day a week instead? Maybe that feels more manageable? Or, maybe you hire a babysitter a couple days a week to make it easier for you to leave the house? Or, maybe you find a buddy to workout with?
There are so many options we can discover once we get under the judgment. Your creativity is not accessible until then. It needs space to come up, so releasing the judgment through consideration and forgiveness is the trick. (Like it? Tweet It here.)
Share in the comments below your process. What do you do to recommit? What did you discover when you did this process? What are you most proud of in the new year?
For me, my theme for 2014 is Connection. Connection to my body, to my family and friends, to Spirit, to you and life in general.
I am starting with my body. January is all about taking care of her. So, I am most proud that I have been to the doctor, dentist, eye doctor, chiropractor and more. I am committed to feeling fantastic this year and so far I am invigorated by the process.
Now it’s your turn. Go.
With loving,
Amber