Got Money Anxiety?
Photo by Curated Lifestyle via Unsplash
In the coaching world, it's common for money to become a primary focus—the metric of how we're doing, the measure of our worth, and the ultimate sign of success.
We tell ourselves, “Once I reach this number, I'll feel settled, good enough, like I've finally arrived.” But each time we hit a new financial milestone, that sense of arrival remains just out of reach, and we find ourselves striving again, wondering if we'll ever feel truly secure in our relationship with money.
If you've found yourself in this cycle of trying to get money to bring you inner peace, you're not alone. It's so easy to believe that reaching a certain income level will bring relief, a sense of accomplishment, or lasting security.
But here's the truth: money alone can't deliver on that promise—and realizing this is actually liberating. Money is simply pointing us toward something deeper. It's inviting us to discover that we're already okay, no matter the numbers in our bank account or the chaos in the world around us. True security only resides within.
Often the awakening process looks something like this:
Step One: Blind to It—Unaware of the Hidden Motivators
When I first started my coaching practice, my bias toward action felt like a superpower. I took pride in always pushing forward and taking bold steps. I felt a sense of control—like I was doing everything I could to create the change I wanted in my business. On the surface, this ambition served me well; however, beneath it, I was unknowingly reinforcing a cycle that kept me searching outside myself for peace.
I didn't realize it at the time, but below my actions lay a constant hum of anxiety and fear—a sense of urgency tied to my self-worth that I wasn't even aware of. I believed my relentless drive was a sign of my strength, and don't get me wrong; it definitely helped me to grow my business. However, looking back, I see that my over-reliance on doing was a coping mechanism, masking the deeper truth that I was out of sync with myself. I was blind to the true motivations behind my actions.
Step Two: Get Rid of It—Seeing the Pattern and Trying to Fix It Externally
Then, something shifted. My awareness began to open, and I saw that this constant drive was tethered to fear. Fear that I wasn't enough. Fear rooted in shame from credit card debt, and a belief that more was the solution.
At this stage, the idea of “more” became my mission. I figured if I earned more, the fear and shame would go away. So I poured my energy into increasing my income, thinking it would deliver me from worry and finally allow me to feel safe, secure, and worthy. If I signed a client, I felt good. If I didn't, I felt like I was failing. The success and peace I was chasing always felt just out of reach, like a finish line that kept moving.
That's the bind that money can hold over us—the belief that something outside of us is the answer. So we chase. We compare. We achieve. We set new milestones, only to reset them the moment we get there, because the feeling we're really after—peace, worthiness, safety—remains elusive.
Step Three: Welcoming What Is— Turning Inward and Realizing Change Begins Inside
Eventually, something deeper cracked open. I began to see that my anxiety wasn't a problem to solve or an obstacle to overcome—it wasn't something that could be silenced by anything external—not by money, clients, or achievements. In fact, the more I tried to resolve the pain using something outside of me, the more exhausted I felt.
I realized that my anxiety, fear, and shame were just as much a part of me as joy, peace, and love. They didn't need fixing because there was nothing wrong with them. They were signals from within, responding to an inner misunderstanding, inviting me back to balance and clarity.
I saw that anxiety was a coping strategy I unconsciously employed whenever I didn't feel safe. It manifested not only in my relationship with money, but also in my body, marriage, friendships, schedule, and so much more. Even now, it shows up fairly consistently—which I view as a sign of progress. The pattern is shifting from unconscious to conscious, and this shift is healing; it allows me to respond differently. With this practice, I find that I can return to a place of wholeness with greater ease.
For years—decades, really—I tried to control the external world to create a sense of security within, unknowingly outsourcing my value and stability. This new understanding has opened my heart to myself and helped me recognize the innocence behind the pattern. When I didn't feel safe, a part of me created anxiety as a protective mechanism. Now, instead of resisting or running away from those feelings, I choose to meet them with curiosity and compassion.
This was the real awakening: letting go of the illusion that anything outside of me could make me feel whole and enough. True peace wasn't waiting on the other side of a financial milestone; it was available within, right here and now, by welcoming every part of my experience.
An Invitation to a Deeper Game
What if we used money as a teacher and not just the main goal? What if we listened to what it's showing us about our deeper patterns, about the places we're ready to evolve? For me, this journey has been about learning to meet my own experiences with kindness and courage, finding a sense of safety that's not dependent on anything outside of myself.
This is what we'll be exploring in my upcoming program for coaches and practitioners, Launch 2025: Awaken Your Potential & Elevate Your Practice.
If you're ready to dive beneath the surface and play a different game—one that supports genuine financial growth while also nurturing sustainable peace within yourself—this program may be for you. Yes, we'll be exploring ways to increase your income, and more importantly, we'll be diving into the freedom available within, so you're no longer tethered to the outcome.
Click here to learn more about Launch 2025: Awaken Your Potential and Elevate Your Practice.
If it resonates, I invite you to reach out. Let's talk about how this journey might serve you in 2025. I'm scheduling conversations now.
With loving,
Amber
