Saying No With Grace
Saying no is a requirement in life and work. Whether you are at the beginning of your practice and need to say no to social time, scrolling on Facebook or added job demands, or whether you’re further along in your business and need to say no to requests for interviews, partnerships and more, learning to say no with grace is a game-changer.
I thought I was pretty good at this…until I recently received one of the most beautiful no’s of my life. This person showed me how it’s possible to have a no feel like a gift!
I had interviewed this person in the past and attended a workshop she led where I got to meet her and learn her modality in an intimate setting. All to say, I had an established relationship with her—which, in my experience, can make saying no more challenging.
Her newest book is required reading for my Advanced Group for coaches. I reached out to see if she would be a guest speaker/coach for them as well.
Here is what I received back:
“Dear Amber,
It was so, so lovely to get your message and to hear about you and to go back to your beautiful website and take in again your inspiring and compelling work. Every life you touch, including mine, is blessed.
And I am honoured that you would like me to meet with your group to explore together The Promise (thank you for inviting them to read it.) I wish so, so much that I could do that, but I have decided not to add any more Zoom group events to 2022 and to start building in more spacious time for me, to do the next writing I want and need to do, and to expand my learning time. So with a heavy heart I have to say no.
Please know, though, that I will be sending you celebration for all you do and all you are, and hoping so much that we can stay in touch, and someday, somehow meet again.
With much love to you,
N”
If you’re curious who this magnificent human is, its Nancy Kline, creator of The Thinking Environment. If you aren’t familiar with her and her work, you want to be. (You can listen to our interview as a starting point here.)
I appreciate so much about her response. She remembers and acknowledges me, and also demonstrates how committed she is to her priorities in her life.
This is one of the keys to success: knowing and honoring your priorities—that change from season-to-season. The more clear you are on these, the easier it is to be ruthless in your time…and the more willing you are to say no to what’s not aligned.
What are your priorities in your coaching practice right now? What do you need to say no to? And, how is Nancy’s email helping you do that?
Write back and tell me…cause, I’m cheering you on!
With Fierce Loving,
Amber
ps: This list is specific to coaches. I have another community where I share life lessons, resources and inspirations—think craft of coaching focus. If you aren’t already signed up and you’d like to receive my Fierce Loving Newsletter, sign up here.
Photo by Courtney Lindberg Photography.
