She Thinks She's an F
Near the end of the year I read Carolyn Freyer-Jones inspiring book, What If This is the Fun Part? In it I share an excerpt of my experience working with Michelle Bauman—the coach who fundamentally helped me change my way of being and way of living.
I kept many of the emails Michelle sent me—her coaching helped me be a better coach. Below you’ll find a timely exchange to consider as you dream into your coaching practice this year and support your clients in their visioning as well.
Context:
I wrote Michelle about a client I was working with who was very hard on herself. She wanted financial success in her coaching practice NOW and her actions backed her intention. However, she was frantic inside, sporadic with her energy, implementing every idea that came to her mind. I found myself tired after our sessions and feeling frustrated because I didn’t know how to help her.
Michelle’s Loving Response:
Bless this person. – boy is she lucky to have landed with you!
Here’s one thing for your consideration . . . she thinks she’s an “F” – help her see she’s a B+ – that she’s not as far away as she thinks she is. She has lots of self awareness. She knows what her issues are – she thinks she has lots and lots of issues – that she’s a mess etc. One of your jobs is going to relax her and slow her down -(which you are already doing) — really in many ways that’s the most important thing for her. Wherever you start – what ever kind of process you do will be great. You’ll know inside of the coaching relationship – or can ask her where she wants to start.
But – in my experience – it really helps people if you can show them that they are not as far away as they think. Really – she only has one issue – a relentless drive to succeed on the goal in an attempt to feel secure. Who doesn’t have that issue And she’s way ahead because she can see it, she can talk about it, she knows it’s not working, she hired a coach, she’s willing to experiment with something different – she is much much closer than she thinks.
Your #1 job with her will likely be to relax her.
You are doing a great job with her Amber – I think everything you share with her is excellent!
Does this help?
Love, Michelle
Getting Accurate
Do you have a relentless desire to succeed on the goal in an attempt to feel secure? Are you so focused on the goal that you’re missing the success you already have? Are you judging yourself as an “F” when you’re really a “B+”?
There is nothing wrong with wanting success. I’m all for you having a business and life you love. And, learning to see yourself accurately is required to have the success you want.
Helping coaches see themselves more clearly is part of what we provide at The CFJ Coaching Success School. Yes, we teach practical skills for how to “get” clients. We also work on the inner experience of the coach. Your way of being—with yourself and others—matters. How you relate to money matters. How you judge yourself and your progress matters.
Being in a school where there is a focus on both: external skills and implementation alongside internal inquiry and action (reframing outdated beliefs, healing memories, being kinder to oneself in the process) creates knockout results for the students and their clients.
It’s not too late to join the 2022 class. We start Thursday January 13th and there are only three spots left.
If you want to talk with me about how the school can assist your growth, email back asap so I can squeeze you in before we begin. Or, if you’re clear you are ready to uplevel and have your biggest growth year yet in your practice, register here.
Whether I get to see you and work with you in the 2022 CFJ Class or not, know I am holding that this year be a year of more meaningful success, more enjoyable success and more accuracy in how you see yourself than ever before.
With Fierce Loving,
Amber
Photo by Averie Woodard.