I was working on my book this week and felt inspired to share an excerpt with you:
“Changing my body was the first thought I had when I woke up in the morning and the last one I had going to bed at night. I’d ask myself, What am I going to eat to lose weight? How am I going to exercise? How am I going to lose two inches from my thighs because my agent told me I should.
“You’re face is good,” he said, looking over the rim of his wire-framed glasses. “Your upper body is pretty good,” he added, pointing at my chest. “Can you do something about your hips and thighs?”
My face burned with shame—further proof there was something wrong with my body. I felt hopeless, because I had been trying, and it—I—wasn’t good enough.
“Sure,” I said, with the most pleasing smile I could muster.
Now my mission was set. Must lose weight from butt and thighs at all costs. No dinner tonight. Run five miles tomorrow. Create new meal plan. Life was better with a plan. I didn’t have to feel anxious or ashamed as long as I was in motion. This was one of my many avoidance tactics. And, it worked for a while.
Recalling this, I’m stunned that I couldn’t see how hard I was on myself. I was so inside of it, I was blind. I believed there was something wrong with my body. Period.
Imagine what a big moment it was when I made the connection: I’m in an abusive relationship—with myself!”
So many women (and men) are walking around wounded when it comes to their bodies. They’re holding onto memories, experiences and harsh words people said from their past—using them as ammunition or motivation today.
Part of healing is slowing down to be with those tender memories. I have so much compassion for that bright-eyed, willing-to-do-anything-to-succeed, actress, who sat across from that agent and took his words as the gospel. She was so insecure and so desperately wanting to be loved.
That’s a photo of me at that time below.
Clearly she’s not so bad…and I see that now. I get to love her now. I get to see and celebrate her beauty, determination and pure sweetness. She did the best she could given what she knew and what she had. This is an example of Fierce Loving.
I’m leading a complimentary workshop designed to support you in Fiercely Loving Your Body. On this 90-minute call you’ll:
- learn what Fierce Loving means & how to apply it to your body.
- find out the biggest obstacle in the way of feeling good about yourself.
- discover the best question to ask to create transformation and live Fierce Loving every day.
- learn what you really want in your body & what to do about it.
- connect more deeply & find empathy for your body.
- receive direct coaching from me (Amber)
- hear from women, just like you, who used this material to honor the body they were given (and ultimately experience greater peace, freedom and joy in their lives)
If you have stories from your past creeping into your present, that are no longer serving you, I encourage you to be there. Bring your biggest challenge when it comes to your body and I will help you transform it.
This event has passed. Click here to sign up to be the first to know about the next free class.
If you have any questions, simply email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
With Fierce Loving,