Are You Being Seduced?
Photo: Kateryna Hliznitsova
There is a difference between settling and an opportunity to deepen.
At my recent in-person Launch 2024: Live event, a participant shared how their 1:1 and group coaching had started to feel transactional.
They knew those offerings were the fastest way to bring in money—which they needed to pay for their lifestyle—but what they really wanted to focus on was writing a book and building a membership program.
Those dreams felt more sparkly and alive…yet, they weren't going to pay the rent for a while—if ever.
So they opted to stay the course, devoting their time to having enrollment conversations, all the while growing resentful because that “took time away” from what they really wanted.
This experience is so human. It's easy to get seduced by what feels sparkly, full of bells and whistles—after all, we live in an instant gratification culture!
And, when we believe the shiny thing is better, we turn our attention away from our loyal companion—in this case, 1:1 and group programs—and miss the opportunity to deepen.
There is a level of intimacy, vulnerability and loving that opens up in longterm commitments that doesn't when we move from the next, to the next.
Think about it: If you've ever been in a long-standing, committed relationship, you know there is a level of loving—a deepening, sweetness and comfort—that doesn't happen when you're in the dating phase.
The same is true in our work.
It's easy to judge aspects of what we do as boring or same-old, same-old, and when we do this, that's an invitation to be curious. Some part of us had closed off. We're no longer in the richness of the present moment. We're likely in the ego's construct of the grass is always greener.
When we buy into this, we squash the magic of life and suffer.
What's beautiful in this story is that once this person saw how they had been withholding love and putting demands on the bread and butter in their business, they immediately course corrected. They showed up in their conversations open, listening deeply and willing to be surprised.
They chose to intentionally bring their loving to each conversation they had.
The result?
You guessed it. More energy and more money! Allowing them pockets of time to devote to their bigger dreams.
Learning when to opt-out and when to stay in a process. So many of us leave because we're afraid of the vulnerability that comes with rich commitment (but don't want to admit that to ourselves). And, if we are willing to muster the courage to stay, a whole new world can reveal itself…many times offering the 'pot of gold' we thought we'd find elsewhere.
If you've gotten caught up in shiny object syndrome, you aren't alone. May this be your invitation to pause and decide if you want to stay that course or deepen.
How wonderful there is no wrong or right. There is only where you are now and your choice.
With loving,
Amber
