How You Unconsciously Keep What You Want Out
Photo: Brooke Cagle
I was on a call recently with someone about Discover, Live, Trust Your Truth. In our conversation, the person shared how they were known as the serious one in their household and their partner the fun one.
They expressed how joy was their biggest opportunity for growth because happiness didn't come naturally. It felt unfamiliar and unsafe.
As we explored I learned they were raised in a volatile, even violent environment where instability and unpredictability were rampant. If moments of happiness occurred, they were often interrupted to the point where this person unconsciously made a decision to ensure survival: stay serious, fun is dangerous.
This unconscious decision was brilliant at the time. It helped them survive.
And, yet, that programming was continuing to impact their life today, even though they were far removed from the volatility of their upbringing.
This is because we recreate what we know. We find comfort in what's familiar.
Our autonomic nervous system acts as an unconscious surveillance system looking for threats to our survival. This system carries information passed on from our ancestors and tends to get set during childhood. Meaning, on an unconscious level a part of you will recreate what felt safe in your upbringing.
In this case, unhappiness was the imprinted program that wanted to play out time and again.
We all have our own versions of this. Yours may be a program of negativity/what's wrong thinking or achieving/patterns of perfection or using chaos as motivation or something else.
No matter the pattern, the opportunity is to meet it as you are today. You could do this on the mental, emotional, or physical/body levels.
My focus for this newsletter is on the body. Your body brain (aka your autonomic nervous system) is stunning. As I shared above, it constantly monitors your environment without your awareness for information about what's safe and what isn't. Then it sends signals to the brain for an automatic, appropriate response.
This is why we unconsciously recreate our pattern of safety—even if that perceived safety is detrimental to our health now.
The good news is that it's possible to teach your nervous system a different response. You can build your capacity for happiness, joy, positivity, embracing messiness, and more.
How you do that is by honoring the language of your body. Your body is an animal, so it communicates differently than your mind. It receives information through the senses, energy, and breath. This is why somatic practices sometimes look silly but are effective and valuable in their own right.
I'm sure you've seen dogs 'shake off' after an uncomfortable encounter. Or perhaps you've seen children instinctively rock back and forth when they felt uncertain. These are examples of the body giving itself what it needs to come back into balance.
Sometimes our body needs us to 'shake off'. Other times it needs us to gently caress ourselves or place our feet on the ground to connect to the energy of Mother Earth.
There are many somatic practices we can employ for our healing and to build the capacity to expand what feels safe.
I can't wait to share more of them inside Discover, Live, Trust Your Truth.
Integrating these practices has been key in changing my way of being. I'm so lit up about this work. My coaching began with the body and it feels aligned to be incorporating it back in this elevated way.
If you've been working on a pattern on the thought level for a while and don't feel you're getting anywhere, somatic practices may be a beautiful next move to layer in.
I've extended the application deadline for Discover, Live, Trust Your Truth to Sunday, July 16th.
(I didn't want to bombard your email inbox this week.)
This mastermind is going to be unlike any other. Participants will leave with unique-to-them integrated practices to feel more peace, less fear and connect with Source in a greater way.
Space is limited. Don't miss the chance to join this experience.
With loving,
Amber
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